The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Rodney Dangerfield (1981)

Source: The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Mr. Dangerous Rodney Dangerfield.

Source:The Daily Review 

Every time I hear Rodney Dangerfield talk about his wife I think of the sitcom Married With Children and the marriage between Al and Peggy Bundy. They have two kids as well and that might be the only reason why they stayed married. To hear Al Bundy (played by Ed O'Neal) you would think you were listening to Hot Rod do his standup routine about his wife. But replace Mrs. Dangerfield with Peggy Bundy. They make so many cracks about their wives you would have to think they were drunk when they got married and had kids together. Otherwise why would a sane sober man marry and have kids with a women he doesn't like and isn't attracted to. Unless he's an idiot.

The 'I get no respect' routine is what made Rodney Dangerfield a star. And then add the wife bit and that makes the routine ever better. Because now Rod can say he doesn't even get respect from his wife. Again, how believable this is, you can decide for yourself. Maybe the only reason why Mrs. Dangerfield stayed with Rod is because she rather be with an overweight unattractive successful man, than a handsome well-built loser who can't even hold down a job as a burger flipper at a fast food joint. I mean how hard is it to flip burgers anyway. But perhaps you would have to ask Mrs. Dangerfield that yourself. And she also might show also show you how flip charcoal, I mean burgers as well. But you take away 'I get not respect', what does Hot Rod have going for him. But he played it as well and as long as anyone could.
Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Rodney Dangerfield (1983)

Source:The Lazy Cow- comedian Rodney Dangerfield, on The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson, in 1983.

Source:The Daily Review 

"Rodney Dangerfield Funniest Jokes Ever On The Johnny Carson Show 1983 online video cutter com."

From The Lazy Cow

I'm not an expert on Rodney Dangerfield, but I believe this is his best performance on this show. This wasn't an interview at all. Johnny Carson, maybe asked Hot Rod one or two questions. And Rod just did his act with one wisecrack after another. Mostly about his wife and kids which might be why male comedians get married so they can have people they know really well that they can make fun of.

Unless they're always on the road and when they're in town they mostly are just hanging out with their mistress and their bastard kids they're keeping a secret in some hell hole of an apartment, its their wife and kids that they know the best.

This wasn't Hot Rod's: "I get no respect routine" where he goes off on some airline for giving his first-class seat away because he was five-seconds late for the flight. Or the great view of the bathroom that he gets when he goes to his favorite restaurant.

This was Rod's: "My wife and kids routine" where he goes off on his wife Mary (or whatever her name is) for sleeping with other guys, because she has to have sex and every time she sees her husband naked she just laughs and can't performed adequately as a result.

And his son Joe (or whatever his name is) for being so dumb and wild that he believes every time Joe goes out he needs a leash, so he doesn't run into doors, because he forgot to open them. And his daughter Sally (or whatever her name is) who sleeps with her teachers, because she's too dumb to do the work in school. And he did a great job.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Shelley Winters (1987)

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Hollywood Goddess Shelly Winters in 1987.

Source:The Daily Review

If Shelley Winters wasn't the great actress that she was, she probably would have been a standup comedian, or a variety show comedian doing skit-comedy, or a talk show host. She was an enormous talent and personality who had an incredible wit and intelligence. Literally not just one of the best actress's who has ever lived, but one of the greatest personalities and comedians as well. Great entertainer who reminds me a lot of the great Ginger Rogers. As far as an entertainer who combined such great talent for the dramatic, who also had a great personality and was very funny. Who was both very adorable and yet very bright and funny all in the same package.

Johnny Carson, was perfect for Shelley, because he was also very bright and had a very quick off the cuff humor and perhaps shared the exact same sense of humor as Shelley. So they related very well and could make fun of the same things and shared similar experiences. Like being married enough times to produce enough kids to fill up the L.A. Memorial Coliseum. Or both having enough spouses combined (if not by themselves) to fill out an LAPD police lineup. They also knew each other very well. When Johnny was interviewing Shelley Winters, or someone like that, or a Burt Reynolds, Jimmy Stewart, he was interviewing actors who could match him joke for joke and even sound funnier.
Source:NBC

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Jim Garrison (January 31st, 1968)

Source: David Von Pein- New Orleans DA & JFK assassination conspiracy theorist Jim Garrison.

Source The Daily Review

I always found it interesting about Jim Garrison and why would a New Orleans District Attorney be investigating the assassination of a U.S. President who was assassinated in Dallas, Texas. Which is about a thousand miles or so from New Orleans. And spend ten years of New Orleans taxpayer dollars on this investigation an investigation that was under the jurisdiction of the Dallas PD and the FBI. And I don't believe Oliver Stone's JFK movie from 1991 which I've seen several times, has ever made that clear. If you want to know why Oliver Stone is such a conspiracy theorist, is because of serious people like Jim Garrison who come up with these incredible theories. Maybe its just me, but you would think a big city District Attorney like Jim Garrison would have enough crime cases of his own to investigate.

The only conspiracy theory that I believe is worth considering, that any serious person with respect on these issues, someone like Robert Blakey, who was the Chief Counsel of the House Assassinations Committee in the late 1970s that looked into the JFK assassination, is the theory involving organized crime. Especially the Italian Mafia in America in Dallas and Chicago in particular. They clearly wanted President John Kennedy killed and would have had the access and power to pull it off. And Lee Harvey Oswald, who wasn't interested in his own personal safety and freedom, would have been the perfect assassin for them. Not saying that the Italian Mafia did have Kennedy assassinated, but they could've done it if they wanted to pull it off. And the Jack Ruby and Lee Oswald connections, I believe give this theory credibility.

I think its obvious that Lee Oswald was the assassin who killed President Kennedy. It was his gun, he worked at the Dallas Book Depository, he had the means, motive, access, he could pull this off and was a good enough shooter to do it. The only question here is did anyone put him up to it. Was this a one-man operation, or were there others involved. Like members of Chicago or Dallas organized crime. Jack Kennedy, had plenty of enemies on the Far-Right in Dallas and perhaps Texas as a whole. The Far-Left especially Communists like Lee Oswald, hated him as well. The Italian Mafia hated Kennedy, because his administration was serious about putting them out of business. After the Mafia helped Kennedy get elected president especially in Chicago in 1960. With all of these factors its hard to believe that one little loser could have pulled off this assassination by himself. Which is how these conspiracy theories come about.
Source:David Von Pein

Johnny Carson: 'Best Moments on Politics on The Tonight Show'

Source:Sovereign Rebellion- The King of Late Night Johnny Carson, talking to CBS News's Mike Wallace, on 60 Minutes, in 1979.

Source:The Daily Review 

"Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.

In addition, the Center for Media and Social Impact (CMSI) has adopted a set of best practices as it relates to the copyright doctrine of fair use when making online videos. Specifically, any reproduction, reposting, or quoting in order to memorialize, preserve, or rescue an experience, an event, or a cultural phenomenon is an acceptable use of copyrighted material under fair use."  

From Sovereign Nation

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Some guy named Jim & President Ronald Reagan.

"Johnny Carson's Best Moments on Politics." From Johnny Carson. The video has since been deleted or blocked on YouTube.

I haven't seen them all, but I believe my favorite Johnny Carson political skit is the politician under the lie detector. Because that plays so well with today's American politics and I'm sure it played very well back in 1982 politics when that skit was done. Just imagine how many politicians would disqualify themselves from running for office, or would have to resign from office if they were always under a lie detector every time they spoke in public.

Imagine if politicians had to answer questions in public about their records under a lie detector test and here are some examples of what that could be like.

Question- "Senator Jones, why did you vote against the clean energy bill?" Answer-"Because Big Oil told me if I did, they wouldn't bankroll my reelection campaign.

" Question- "Representative Smith, why did you vote against the middle class tax cuts?" Answer-"Because I believe middle class Americans are too stupid to spend their own money wisely. Besides, it's not the people's money anyway, but the government's money."

American politicians have a bad habit of promising their constituents things from government that they don't want to ask the people to pay for. Because they know raising revenue, (another way of saying increasing taxes) or moving funds around, (another way of saying cutting popular programs) could cost them politically. So what they say is they'll give people free roads, or education vouchers, free health care, (to use as examples) instead the theory being if that government does it then the service is free. But anyone familiar with American politics, Milton Friedman and pays taxes, knows there's no such thing as a free lunch. At least when it comes to government.

Imagine if American politicians were asked to explain how they would pay for their new popular government programs and were under a lie detector and didn't know that.

Question- "Senator Wilson, how do you plan to pay for your national childcare program? Well, with the debt and deficit being as high as it is, we're going to have to increase payroll taxes out of people's paychecks, or ask wealthy people to retire later, or a combination of both." Unless Senator Wilson represents Massachusetts, or Vermont, two states that fills out their taxes with smiles on their faces and actually celebrates National Tax Day and sees it as a holiday, he can probably forget about reelection. Because his opponent would call him a tax and spender. Who thinks Americans are under taxed and that government should take more of their hard-earned money from them.

Lying politicians is as common in America as snow is as common in Canada and socialism is as common in Sweden. If a politician is asked at a party by someone who doesn't know them and has never seen them before, what they do for a living? And the politician tells them I'm a state senator, or U.S. Representative, or something like that, the politician might get a drink thrown in their face. And if the politician happens to be President or Vice President of the United States, the drink thrower would probably get tackled to the ground by a Secret Service agent. And be arrested for being so stupid as to not know who the President and Vice President of the United States are. Well, at least not knowing who the President is.

So a full-time lie detector at least for Congress, would throw out a lot of the trash that currently stinks up the House and Senate, because Members of Congress would no longer get away with lying. 

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Ronald Reagan's Funny Return to California (January 4, 1989)

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson, talking about Ronald Reagan's "funny return" to California in 1989.

Source:The Daily Review

I think Johnny's best line here was about President Reagan reaching a deal with Random House to write his presidential memoirs and getting a big advance for it. If you're familiar with Ron Reagan's second presidential term and I am even though I was a kid for his entire presidency and had just started junior high when he left office, you know that President Reagan claimed to not remember a lot of key parts of his second term. Iran Contra, being a perfect example of that and claiming if he didn't know if he had agreed to the arms for hostages deal in 1985-86. And his own Vice President, his first officer in his administration, a man who was a very active and responsible VP who was in on everything that the President did, George H.W. Bush, claiming to know nothing about Iran Contra. Even though he was at all the meetings.

Johnny's joke being that, "funny how a big advance from Random House to write your memoirs can jumpstart your memory." In this case the memory about Iran Contra and a lot of the key moments of his second term as president. There are only a few ways this could have gone down.

President Reagan, came down with alzheimer's as President of the United States and that is why he forgot so much about his presidency even as President. And if you believe that I have a ski resort in Los Angeles where they get the best snow that I would like to sell you.

President Reagan, was too much of a delegator and not on top of things that were going on at his National Security Council. Which is very believable.

Or of course he knew what was going on the whole time and didn't want Congress to know about arms being traded for hostages in Iran. Because he didn't want to get into trouble for it. Which is also very believable.

A good line Johnny had about Vice President Elect Dan Quayle, who of course was President George H.W. Bush's Vice President. Dan Quayle, was a young U.S. Senator who had only been in Congress for less than twelve years between both the House and Senate by the time Vice President Bush selected him in 1988 and didn't have much a resume before Congress and was 41 at the time, was viewed at the very least by the national media to be not ready and immature and not real bright. He got a bad wrap as being known as an idiot and perhaps immature, but he didn't do much as Vice President to show anyone outside of him that he was up for the second ranking position in the U.S. Government. And Johnny making the crack that Ron Reagan will be having dinner with talk show Merv Griffin. While he will be having finger food at Jack in The Box. (A California fast food joint)
Source:Johnny Carson

CBS News: 60 Minutes- Mike Wallace Interviewing Johnny Carson (1979)

Source:CBS News- The King of Late Night Johnny Carson, on CBS News's 60 Minutes in 1979. 

Source:The Daily Review 

"Part 1 of 2 as Mike Wallace interviews "Tonight Show" host Johnny Carson." 

From Billy Loves Jazz

The perfect interviewer Mike Wallace interviewing the perfect late show talk show host Johnny Carson in 1979. I can’t think of a better combination here other than maybe Mike Wallace interviewing Cary Grant, or someone like that. 

I believe Johnny answered the Mike Wallace question of why don’t you take on serious topics by saying that is not what he does. He’s a comedian and his job was to entertain people and make them laugh. He wasn’t Phil Donahue on the air hosting national town hall everyday. His job was literally make fun of what is going on in the world and have fun with it. He did do political satire and would make fun of what is going on in the news and public officials when they screw up. But again doing it in a humorous way.

Carson, was a comedian first and talk show host second. And what he would do with his talk format would be to question other comedians and entertainers, because again his job was to entertain people. Not to inform then on what is going on in the Middle East, or why stocks on Wall Street are down. And he would even interview politicians and other public officials, but generally those people would have good if not great sense of humor’s as well. 

Carson would routinely go after politicians like Ron Reagan, Bob Dole, Bill Clinton, Ted Kennedy and they would make fun of politics together and perhaps of each other. I believe Carson was interested in politics and current affairs a lot which is why he did read and watch a lot of news, but he wasn’t going to use his show simply cover the issues of the day. But to make fun of what is going on in the world.

Classic Comedy Bits: Johnny Carson- Standup Comedy (1964)

Source:Classic Comedy Bits- comedian Johnny Carson in 1964.

Source:The New Democrat 

"John William "Johnny" Carson (October 23, 1925 – January 23, 2005) was an American television talk show host and comedian, best known for his 30 years as host of The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson (1962–1992). Carson received six Emmy Awards, the Governor's Award, and a 1985 Peabody Award. He was inducted into the Television Academy Hall of Fame in 1987. Johnny Carson was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1992 and received a Kennedy Center Honor in 1993.

Although his show was already successful by the end of the 1960s, during the 1970s, Carson became an American icon and remained so even after his retirement in 1992. He adopted a casual, conversational approach with extensive interaction with guests, an approach pioneered by Arthur Godfrey and previous Tonight Show hosts Steve Allen and Jack Paar. Former late-night." 

From Comedy Classic Bits

Source:The New Democrat- comedian Johnny Carson in 1964.

Not the best Johnny Carson performance I’ve ever heard and I’m a fairly big fan of his. Not his biggest fan or his tallest fan. There are Carson fans who are taller, bigger and stronger than me and I’m a big tall guy at 6’5 220 pounds or so. 

I sort of got this feeling early on when in this video that Carson’s tank might have been running a little on empty as he was just standing there silent with a smirk for the first ten seconds or so. 

By the way, Johnny Carson reminds me of George W. Bush as well as GW Bush’s father. And the reason he reminds me of GW, is well their faces look very similar to me and they are about the same size. But also they have a very similar smirk. And perhaps Carson made the cracks about the cameras and all of that because he was going off the top of his head without much if any prepared material.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Richard Pryor (1977)

Source:NBC- Rich & Johnny-

Source: The New Democrat

Remember my advice about marriage and divorce, I’ll tell you again anyway. Don’t get married if you don’t want to get divorced. Especially don’t get married rich, because you may be poor or middle class by the time you’re divorced. And if you’re dumb or crazy enough to get married rich, but you don’t want to get divorced, at least be smart and sane enough to get married while you’re sober at the same time. So if you’re going to get married, make sure you know who you’re marrying. Make sure you’re intelligent and sane at the time. But this one might also be as important, make you’re also sober.

As far as censorship, imagine had Richard (I’m not Little Dick Pryor) had made it big ten-years later after he did. Why I say that, because by 1977 cable was basically an infant if that. If you had cable back then, probably only shopaholics and movie junkies had it, like wives of rich men to use as an example. Because back then you were looking at maybe the home shopping channels and movie channels as far as what was on cable. Basically Home Box Office and the Home Shopping Channel. Unemployed people who watch too many morning and afternoon movies. And shopaholics, like wives married to rich men.

But lets say Pryor makes it big in the late 1970s or early 1980s. Now if NBC, ABC, CBS or even PBS back then said, “you know what Richard, your act is too radical and your language is too foul for our Ozzie and Harriet Leave it To Beaver trapped in the 1950s audience. We can’t let you do your routine on our network”. Richard could tell the networks, the hell with you! (Or something much stronger) “I’m taking my act (or something stronger) to HBO or Showtime”. Or what have you. But again the smart entertainers know about censorship. And the great ones don’t need TV to be successful anyway.
Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Don Rickles & Dom DeLuise (1983)

Source:The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson- Comedian Don Rickles, in 1983. 

Source:The New Democrat

After Don Rickles essentially going off on one of his crazy tantrums for fifteen-minutes or so, the only thing I got from this, well I got a few things, but Rickles is crazy. Someone spiked his apple juice with scotch, perhaps LSD or something. Or perhaps Rickles spiked his own apple juice with LSD. Johnny Carson was obviously a very patient man, I guess as long as the audience was enjoying Rickles.

Ed McMahon, is obviously the highest paid yes man of all-time. I would argue overpaid, I mean seriously how hard is it to say yes. I mean you don’t even have to speak English to say it. All right fine, Big Ed said, yes! Yeah, fine now I’m impressed and I bet Big Ed could tie his own shoes, which came from all the experience that he tied Johnny Carson’s shoes. But I still think Big Ed was overpaid. And that Don Rickles represents the fact that we don’t have enough people living in mental hospitals.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Lauren Bacall (1980)

Source:The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson- Hollywood Goddess Lauren Bacall in 1980. 

Source:The New Democrat

I had an excellent motivation for not skipping school as a student. My father would’ve found out about the day that it happened and would’ve kicked my ass for it. Which meant day after day taking one boring class after another and trying to stay awake the whole time, without any coffee or any caffeine inside of the classroom. Well it wasn’t really all that bad. Some classes I was actually wide awake for. It is kind of hard to fall asleep playing basketball in gym, trust me I’ve tried. But similar to Lauren Bacall, I went to school in order to finish it. And get out of it what I needed to be able to move on. Not to have a good time, even though I managed to do that as well.

As far as Hollywood marriages. Classic case of the career move. “Gee, if I marry Joe or Mary, or at least get seriously involved with them, they’ll introduce me to Tom or Sally and I can get that part in that movie I want to be in and future big roles. And my publicity and reputation will shoot up”. There’s a big reason why half of American marriages end in divorce. One word, Hollywood and it’s probably more like 6-7 out of ten marriages out there that end in divorce. I mean they are all entertainers and have all played the role of husband and wife on the big or small screens and have played those roles in real-life as well.

Easy for me to say as someone who is not in Hollywood. But my advice would be for people out there to marry people they are truly in love with and are in love with them. And only marry when those things are there and you want to get married at that point. Because once you get married and you’re still young enough to have kids, kids come next. And you’re responsible for them whether you are in love with the father or mother or not. And now your career move has just become a very complicated life move that you have to deal with.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Richard Pryor (1979)

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Richard Pryor: "Don't call me Little Richard!" LOL

Source:The New Democrat 

"Richard Pryor Carson Tonight Show 1979" 

From The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

As far as Richard Pryor’s drug abuse: I and millions of his fans are glad he finally got off of illegal narcotics in the 1980s or so. Just wish he did it a lot sooner and perhaps he’s still alive today. Because narcotics can really mess you up (to put it lightly) and turn genius's and people with good intelligence into morons. Because of all the brain cells that you end throwing away and not even donating them so perhaps some other moron can use them and no longer be a moron. But literally throwing them away like they are garbage.

Illegal narcotics and legal narcotics: damn, that’s a heavyweight combination of destruction for you. Sort of like a tank with nuclear weapons, that could go 0-60 in seven seconds or something. (That vehicle is being made in Hollywood as we speak) 

I mean if you’re not a fan of sanity and you think reality is simply too tough for you, drink alcohol until you put some local tavern out business because they are completely out of alcohol. Or go to a local liquor store and buy everything they have and then drink everything and that will take care of your reality problem for you. Because reality would have left the building and flown to Europe or some place. Leaving you to see sounds and hear colors and believe a killer tomato is trying to kill you.

Anyone thinking life is too tough and entertaining suicide, give drunk driving a shot and that will take care of your problem for you. Assuming you don’t screw that up, because now you’re drunk and weren’t very successful sober, so how you supposed to pull off drunk driving drunk: you may not make it to the car and end up in jail or something because you thought the seventy-year old bartender was grabbing your ass. And you took a swing at him and hit the young stud bartender instead and he beat the hell out of you and you both ended up in jail. Or since you’re now drunk, perhaps you forgot about the drunk driving part or ended up in a cab going home.

I have a full-proof plan of how to avoid divorce in life: don’t get married. Seriously it works every time. I mean how many divorce men you know who have never been married. Now you might know a drunk who says they’ve never been married, but divorced five times. But why take the word of a drunk. 

I know what you’re thinking right: “Too simple, how come I never thought of myself. Now I’ve been married five times and have fifteen kids and paying alimony and child support to all five of my ex-wives." Trust me, it works and just a little common sense for anyone intelligent enough to understand it.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Jack Benny (1973)

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Comedian Jack Benny in 1973.

Source:The New Democrat

As far as fame, I would think someone who would have to be a complete narcissist to not be able to live well without fame. And perhaps narcissist is too polite. Maybe I don’t know jackass or asshole would be more appropriate. I mean if I was in Hollywood, I would probably enjoy the work, assuming I was good at it, (not a safe assumption) but I would probably go crazy without some downtime. Without the ability to get out of the city and just collect my thoughts and regroup for a couple of weeks, without someone recognizing me. But this is speaking as someone who is not famous, so I perhaps I would feel differently otherwise.

Shopaholics, that that’s the ticket for wealthy man. Marry a woman who loves to spend other people’s money, especially when they aren’t paying the bills. But what a man does with his wife is his own business and Jack I guess could afford an expensive, high-end wife. Who would perhaps consider it an insult to only be able to shop in Cleveland. And must be able to shop in Paris or Rome, again with someone else’s money, in order to feel loved. But again Jack’s wife and their marriage is their business.

Jack Benny’s best line was the Mark Twain quote about aging. And I’m going to paraphrase here. But he said that if you don’t mind aging, it doesn’t matter. Which means to me that aging like almost everything else has its positives and negatives. The better you age, the better you live. You age and live well by taking care of yourself. You don’t do those things and live may be hell for you and that is when you’re sober. And you’ll become old real fast.
Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: George Carlin (1986)

Source:The Tonight Show Johnny Carson- comedian George Carlin in 1986.

Source:The New Democrat 

About being lazy. Who hasn't been lazy unless you are a workaholic, or a drug addict addicted to speed or something. We've all woken up in the morning feeling like we shouldn't have woken up. "Why did I wake up feeling like this" and go back to bed and perhaps are real late for work. I know that has happened to me more times than I care to admit to. Actually I don't even care to admit to that, so consider that a gift. And don't bother trying to return that gift, because you'll probably be charged for returning it, because nobody is going to want it.

Interesting to hear George Carlin say that he's in good health except for his heart attack. Which is like a football team saying that al they did was lose fifteen games, but they did manage to win one. "Hey we aren't completely imperfect, just mostly". You get a heart attack and you're one step away from death. And if that is not motivation enough to at least perhaps get you to change your lifestyle, nothing will. Maybe a suicidal person who is also an idiot at the same time and perhaps that is why they are suicidal and are so stupid, they even fail at killing themselves, wouldn't understand that.

I liked Johnny Carson's dumb question to George asking him, " did your heart attack scare you?" Well again unless you're suicidal or have balls harder than concrete of course that would scare you! I mean what is the next question, "how did the heart attack make you feel?" Well again not to make this whole post about suicide, but of course you'll feel scared about that and perhaps think you are going to die. If you're suicidal you might be thinking, "come on God, I'm ready to go!".

Bad names for kids. Not a problem I have to worry about considering I don't have kids and perhaps will never have kids (knock on wood). But for all you caring parents out there who care about your kids health and reputation and success in life, do your kids justice and give them a responsible name. Don't name your son Leslie, unless you are want them to be gay or something. Give your son a real guys kind of name that commands respect. So you don't have to worry about him getting beat up, or losing his lunch money. Same thing with girls, give them a real feminine name, but don't name them Buffy or something where they have to worry about bimbo jokes.

As far as dumb people. Who would we have to make fun of if America was a country that mostly produced perfect people and other genius's? That is where humor comes from, from watching people screw up and a big part of being human is screwing up and experiencing things before we know what they mean, or how to react to them. That is how we learn in life. So eliminate the stupid people and you'll see unemployment sore in America especially in Los Angeles with all of the out-of-work comedians and other entertainers.

Just a little look at life from human being.
Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Elizabeth Taylor- On Her Countless Marriages (1991)

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Hollywood Goddess Elizabeth Taylor, on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson in 1991.

Source:The New Democrat 

"Johnny Carson and Elizabeth Taylor on Marriage on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show. Elizabeth Taylor talks about her many marriages on "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson" in 1991. "

From The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson 

"Elizabeth Taylor interview on Johnny Carson 1992" 

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Elizabeth Taylor in 1991-92.

From Athena Grey 

"Elizabeth Taylor interview on Johnny Carson in 1992." 

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson- Elizabeth Taylor in 1991-92.

From Hollywood Sinama 

"Elizabeth Rosemond Taylor was considered one of the last, if not the last, major star to have come out of the old Hollywood studio system. She was known internationally for her beauty, especially for her violet eyes, with which she captured audiences... 

Source:Dame Elizabeth Taylor- on The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson in 1991-92.

From Dame Elizabeth Taylor

I'm going to try to write this post without sounding like too much of an asshole, but no promises. Because I truly love, admire and have the utmost respect for The Great Elizabeth Taylor and that is exactly what she was. At least when she was healthy and sober and not starving poor countries because she couldn't control her appetite. Or denying the rest of the world alcohol because she would drink anything with a smell of alcohol in it. Like I said, no promises. 

But again when she was on her game, you were talking about a beautiful baby-face adorable brunette, no matter how old she was, who was funny enough to go toe-to-toe with the great comedian, The King of Late Night  Johnny Carson. As you see in this video and when you lived the life that she did, which was exactly what she did, lived her life and didn't just be alive trying to please others with how she lived, but she lived her life with a lot of ups and downs because she took a lot of risks that came though for her and also backfired. And when you live like that, you leave yourself open for satire.

The only way Liz Taylor was the stereotypical actress, was with her personal life. That being such a great beautiful, adorable and funny actress I guess didn't bring enough fame for her and how she lived her personal life if anything made her just as famous. Marrying so many men, that there were lonely women in Los Angeles, gorgeous sexy lonely women in Los Angles. And in a lot of cases married and why was that, because all of those men were with Liz at least at one time or the other.

Sober healthy Liz, I don't think there is a better actress as far as delivery, personality, intelligence, sense of humor, wit, the woman had it all and is better than anyone else. And then you add the facts that she was again a beautiful, sexy, baby-face brunette who was about as sexy as any great biker or rocker chick you may ever see, as you see in this video in her late fifties and she was the definition of total package when it came to actress's. But when she wasn't sober and unhealthy, meaning overweight if not obese, you're talking about a verbal punching bag for comedians. What a life.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Joan Rivers is Hilarious On Johnny Carson (1986)

Source:Johnny Carson- Joan & Johnny in 1986. 

Source:The New Democrat

This is going to sound like an obvious statement to anyone lets say under thirty-five or so, but Joan Rivers is right. Wisdom does come with age and for people to get wisdom they simply have to be around and experience things and learn from those experiences to achieve it. Which is why I get so tired of hearing Y Generation people always putting down things simply because they have been around for a while or as old as yesterday. They are the everything is now generation and to hell with anything that happened when they were kids or hadn't been born yet.

Now that's it, I'm tired of being serious and if I go down that road too much longer, I'm going to fall asleep at the computer, but I just wanted to get that off my chest. As far as skinny women vs. curvy women. For you football fans out there, that would be like asking me which team would  I rather have, the 17-0 1972 Miami Dolphins, or the 0-14 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Do you want to win, or lose, you want a woman with a body or someone who gets knocked to the ground every time there's a light breeze in the air.

As far as bimbos. I believe bimbos actually serve as a useful purpose. Not that I would want a whole football team of bimbos. Not even the cheerleading squad, because you would still need cheerleaders who are smart enough to do the cheers. Cheerleading is not just sexy curvy women swinging their legs in the air. It requires some degree of intelligence like being able to follow instructions. But what bimbos do, is give smart people, people to make fun of. And parents to tell their kids, "hey Sally, that is not what you want to be in life. Get your education and everything else".

As far as guys checking out women. There's a way to do it like a man and the way to do it like you've been locked up solitary confinement for twenty-years straight and never saw a women in person, or on TV, or heard one on the radio, or saw one in the magazine, no females came to visit you in the joint, even your mother. All of the prison staff are men and they are all straight by the way. The guy just getting out of long-term isolation drops the quarter in front of the sexy woman to get her to lean over and pick it up. The man enjoys the view and what it in front of him and doesn't do anything obvious at least before they exchange eye-contact and then they take it from there.

Joan Rivers was great on Johnny Carson and one thing I loved about her routine, was that she was real and didn't do anything that wasn't Joan. She knew who she was and where she came from and was damn proud of that and the fact that she also had a great sense of humor and the ability to communicate in a hysterical way about what she saw in life and learned from it and express the weakness's of others in a humorous constructive way, just makes her that much better. She wasn't a bitch, but some who critiqued in a way that could make people better and teach others.
Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Card Tricks With Angie Dickenson (1981)

Source:Johnny Carson - Angie & Johnny in 1981.

Source:The New Democrat 

Angie Dicienson still as cute as a baby in her late forties talking to Johnny Carson in 1981 on The Tonight Show. Talking about cards and stunts. Cards is obviously a very popular activity in Los Angeles and that just didn't start with poker revolution or whatever from 10-15 years ago in Hollywood. But that has been around probably as long as Los Angeles has been the entertainment capital of America. Going back to the 1930s or even longer. Which is one reason why entertainers love going to Las Vegas.

And Johnny Carson of course was well-known for doing card tricks. Which he did quite frequently on The Tonight Show that was one his most popular skits on the show. So they obviously had some things to talk about besides. "Hey Angie, how have you been able to stay so adorable and gorgeous as the same time all of these years?" With Angie answering "well I eat right, work out, get my sleep and besides I'm filthy rich, even after the divorces. And I can afford plastic surgery whenever I feel I need it". Actually she was naturally baby-face adorable and gorgeous. But the card routine saved them from some cheesy dialogue.

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: 'Jimmy Stewart: Delightfully Funny in 1989'

Source:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson - Hollywood actor and comedian Jimmy Stewart, on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson in 1989.

Source:The New Democrat 

"Jimmy Stewart is delightfully funny in this 1989 full interview with Johnny Carson, discussing his funny New Year's resolutions, learning to fly airplanes, playing the accordion, appearing on Broadway, and his daughter's work with mountain gorillas with Dian Fossey. Watch this full Tonight Show episode at:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson. Watch more full Tonight Show episodes at:The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson. Airdate: 1/4/1989." 

From The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson

I can't do a Jimmy Stewart impression. I wish I could, because he's one of my favorite funny actors of all-time. Similar to Cary Grant or Robert De Niro of today. The best I can do with Stewart, is use what are today and have been for a while all of these cheesy expressions and words that he used all the time in his movies. Sounding like a small town country boy going to a big city for the first time in his life and saying things like gee wiz, dog gonnit, cheesy stuff like that. But sounds hysterical when it is in a movie that has a lot of cussing in it, but the movie is edited and replaced with words like this.

But Johnny Carson was right when he said that he could play straight man to Jimmy's comedian and wiseass who is never serious. Johnny could feed him all of the material that Jimmy would need to comment on and Jimmy without a script could do standup off the top of his head without preparation and sound hysterical. As we saw in this video with Johnny asking Jimmy basic questions about what is going on in his life and Jimmy playing comedian in response. Like saying his New Years resolution was to talk faster. One reason he is famous is for talking slow.

Mr. Smith Goes to Washington is one of my favorite movies of all-time. And even though I don't think it was supposed to be, it is also one of the funniest movies of all-time. The humor you see from Jeff Smith in the movie played by Jimmy Stewart is very similar to the real life Stewart. Observational, off the cuff, what are you thinking, no time to prepare, instant humorous analysis of what you are seeing. Which is Jimmy Stewart and what you see in this video on Carson.

The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson: Da Coach Mike Ditka (January, 1987)

Source:The Coaster Nerds- Da Coach Mike Ditka.

Source:The New Democrat 

"1986 Tonight show with Johnny Carson. Super Bowl winning coach Mike Ditka discussing the Chicago Bars Super Bowl. Mike Ditka & Johnny Carson." 

From The Coaster Nerds

Here's a great comedy duo for you: Da Coach (perhaps better known as Mike Ditka) the former head coach of the Chicago Bears in the 1980s and early 90s. And of course The King of LateNight Johnny Carson. 

In January of 1987 and I only know that because they were talking about the upcoming the Super Bowl 21 between the New York Giants and Chicago Bears, the Bears sort of had a disappointing season in 1986 which is why they weren't back in the Super Bowl that season.

Johnny Carson seemed more interested in at the time Bears quarterback Jim McMahon than anything else. And of course Coach Ditka's famous temper as a head coach. And not talking about the Bears 86 season where they didn't even get back to the NFC Final that year and instead lost the divisional playoff to the Redskins. 

I think Ditka pretty much nailed it when he said that: "It is not that Jim McMahon doesn't like him personally, but that Ditka is the coach and McMahon doesn't like authority figures at all."And Ditka was McMahon's head coach that McMahon was directed by.

The Phil Donahue Show: The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson (1970)

Source:The Phil Donahue Show- The Tonight Show Johnny Carson on Phil Donahue, in 1970.

Source:The New Democrat  

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From My Inner Eye Interview

Johnny Carson is not the best interviewer of all-time, but he was a very good interviewer. A bright guy who did his homework. Johnny is not the best standup comedian of all-time, but he's certainly on the short list of greatest standup comedians who have ever performed. 

But what Johnny is, is the best comedy talk/variety show host of all-time because of his ability to do so many things and play so many roles. That generally started off with a very good standup performance of his own, followed by an interview that he would do.

I think what made the The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson work (and there is really only Tonight Show, at least as far as I'm concern) but what made that show work was that it didn't try to be anything other than what it was. 

Johnny would interview everybody and only interview those people as himself. Not interview a politician as if he was Walter Cronkite. Not interview a great athlete as if he was Curt Gowdy. Or interview a great entertainer as if he was Barbara Walters. He was comedian first and foremost and played the other roles on the show as himself doing the best job he can.

The Johnny Carson Show was real and it was about Carson and what made Carson work. The standup part for him and perhaps the comedy skits were natural for him. But the interviews and preparation were work because that wasn't his background, but he was intelligent and knew enough about the other issues he dealt with like interviewing public officials and politicians and interested in those things as well that he could interview people well and have intelligent conversations with them.